Musa ukufihla uma isithandwa sikuhlukumeza

UKUVULWA nokusulwa kwamacala abesifazane abahlukunyezwa amadoda sekwaba yinsakavukela umchilo wesidwaba. Yize kunjalo kodwa kuyavela ukuthi kukhona laba abangathi vu ngokuhlukunyezwa kwabo nokugcina sekuyibona ababoshwayo. Lokhu kuza emuva kokuthi owesifazane eseziphindiselele kowesilisa obelokhu emhlukumeza kuthule. Ongoti bezomthetho bathi kuyingozi ukuhlukunyezwa ungabiki ngoba ungaboshwa nokuboshwa ngalokho.

Ummeli wezomthetho obhekelele amacala abesifazane abahlukunyezwayo, uNkk Silondile Mpungose weZamani Ncama & Associates, uveza ukuthi ukuhlukunyezwa kunezigaba futhi abantu abahlukemeza abesifazane benza lokhu buthule. Iningi labesilisa uveza ukuthi lisuke linendlela yokumphica owesifazane abone sengathi uhlukunyezwa kufanele futhi kube iphutha lakhe.

" Imvamisa yezithandani ezisebudlelwaneni obunobungozi zibukeka zithandana kakhulu ezinkundleni zokuxhumana nasesidlangalaleni ukuze kungabonakali ukuthi kukhona okushaya amanzi. Owesifazane ngokujwayelekile akubi lula ukuthi akhulume ngokuhlukumezeka kwakhe ngoba noma angaqala athi uyaxoxa bavele bamhebeze abantu bababaze indlela athandwa ngayo, abone ukuthi mancane amathuba okuthi kube khona omkholwayo nozomsiza. Uma kungenjalo kuzoba sengathi uhlukunyezwe ngenxa yamaphutha akhe noma bekuyisikhwele sowesilisa omthanda kakhulu," kusho uNkk Mpungose.

Ephetha uthe kubalulekile ukuthi umuntu wesifazane akwazi ukuzivikela angavumeli ukulawulwa imizwa yakhe, abekezele ezitshela ukuthi isoka lisazoshintsha. UNkk Mpungose uthe usizo akudingeki ukuthi uze ulufune ngakini ngoba uzoba nokuzenyeza, okungenani thola ungoti noma izinhlangano ezingakusiza kwezinye izindawo.

Izinto ezibalulekile okumele uziqaphele

-Uma sewuthole incwadi yesivimbelo sokuthi umuntu angasondelani nawe, ungalokothi uyesule noma angaxolisa nixolelane nibuyelane. Lokhu kuzokusiza ukuthi uma ephinda ekwenza lokhu athembise ukukuyeka uphinde ukwazi ukuyoqhubeka nenkantolo.

-Zama ukuthola usizo ubikele ilungu lomndeni noma uxhumane nabaluleka ngezothando, abezinhlangano zabantu abahlukunyezwayo namaphoyisa.

-Uma sewukhethe ukutshela umuntu othile, mvulele isifuba umtshele konke kungabi nemininingwane oyigodlayo ngokuhlukunyezwa kwakho.

-Uma ushaywa, musa ukuzelapha amanxeba ekhaya, hamba uye emtholampilo ubikele abahlengikazi nodokotela balobe phansi imbangela yokulimala kwakho. Nakhona vuleleka ubatshele iqiniso ungaqambi amanga uthi ulinyazwe impahla yasendlini noma uwile ngoba lokho ngeke kuphatheke emaphoyiseni nasenkantolo.

-Vula icala emaphoyiseni, nalo icala ungalesuli ngoba uthi senixolelene nesithandwa sakho, uma kufika usuku lwenkantolo hambani nibazise ngohlelo lwenu lokuzama ukulungisa izinto nithole nezeluleko zomthetho.

Izinhlobo zokuhlukumezeka othandweni

UKunqatshelwa Ukuhlangana Nabanye Abantu

-La usuke ungavumelekile ukuba nabangani, ugcine uyinkomo edla yodwa ukuze ungakwazi nokubaxoxela ngosizi obhekene nalo othandweni lwakho. Akugcini lapho kodwa ngisho umndeni nezihlobo awuvumelekile ukuthi usondelane nabo noma ngabe kunemicimbi ebalulekile emndenini ngeke ulubhade.

Ukuhlukunyezwa Ngokomoya

-Lapho utshelwa ngokuba isehluleki, ububi bakho, isakhiwo noma isisindo somzimba wakho, ushayelwa imithetho ephikisana nenjabulo yakho. Kulula ukuthi umuntu akutshele ngesici sakho nokuthi ngeke waphila ngaphandle kwakhe, uma ungafundile uzohlala ekukhumbuza ukuthi yena ungcono kunawe nangeholo. Akakhohlwa ukukutshela ngokuthi uphelele kuye, akekho omunye umuntu wesilisa ongakuthanda uma uhlukana naye. Uma kukhona indlela oyithathayo, kumele umazise ulisusa ulubeka unyawo ngoba uma kungenjalo sekuyimpi.

Ukuhlukunyezwa Ngokwemali

-Lapha noma ungasebenza kanzima kanjani kodwa akukho ukuzijabulisa ngemali yezithukuthuku zakho ngoba kunomuntu okubalela iholo lakho. Uma uholile uyena ozosho ukuthi imali yakho kumele isebenze kanjani yenze ziphi izidingo ukuze iphele uhlale ungenalo ngisho isenti lokuzijabulisa. Uma kungenjalo uzokufaka uvele ngekhanda ezikweletini, omunye uzokwenza usebenze wedwa yena angasebenzi kodwa iholo libhekele izidingo zenu nobabili ngesinye isikhathi akondlise nezingane zakhe ezinonina. Kukhona nabasebenzisa ukuthi banemali, afune ukuthi uguqe ngedolo phansi uma ufuna into kuyena yize uwunkosikazi wakhe. Akunswinye futhi akuncikisele ngayo yonke into.

UKuhlukunyezwa Ngokushaywa

-Uphilela ukuba ukudla kwenduku, noma ngabe nibe nengxabano encane kangakanani kuphetha ngokuthi akubeke isandla. Izinga liyenyuka njalo angagcini ngokukubhabhadisa ngezimpama kodwa akushaye nangezikhali akulimanze. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi akushaye ngisho phambi kwezingane, izihlobo, omakhelwane nasemicimbini.

Ukuhlukunyezwa Ngokocansi

-Akanandaba ukuthi uphatheke kanjani emoyeni, uma ekufuna ocansini, uyazithathela nje kungabi ndaba zalutho. Kwesinye isikhathi athi eqeda ukukushaya, umabokoboko akufune ucansi. Abanye lokhu bakwenza usakhala usezinhlungwini noma ulimele.